i wanna know why. why cant i get into ocs, why i have hypertension, why the God whom i know to be so great, actually allowed all these to happen. why must i have health less than perfect? Whhy cant this why cant that.
But. honestly im tired of asking. but neither can i actually accept the fact that I have to allow him to take the wheel. Lord, im really wrestling so hard cos i really really cant accept whatever is there before my eyes. the first person i looked towards WAS YOU. I went to the healing room rightaway. but more than a year has passed. and im STILL hypertensive.
while everyone's commissioning, im here, stuck w this medical condition. dudes out there, if ocs is about confinements, extras...maybe hypertension is like an eternal confinement and restriction of certain human privilleges? haha.
the title's wad i wanna do on the inside. but. i just cant.
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